It's time for a comeback!

I have been told by the three people who used to read my blog, that they miss Little Miss Westchester.

Truth be told, I miss them too; and not just because they have given me compliments (which is very high up on the list of my favorite things, behind only reruns of Get Smart and the shiny things I want to put in my mouth), but also because I like to create art work on Microsoft Paint, and this is clearly the only venue where such skills can be put to good use in the real world.

Luckily, I live in a small bubble of office dronedom and in the three months since my last posting, I have only a few key updates to speak of:

1. I have been moved to a desk by the window. Upside, a view of the sunshine and a connection to the world outside; downside, a cubi-cell neighbor who likes to listen to Soulja Boy on repeat out of his computer speakers.

2. Over the past three months I have had many opportunities to travel to glamorous (a word I can now spell without spell check thanks to some catchy lyrics by Fergie) places such as Amsterdam, Cabo San Lucas, and Bayview, Wisconsin.

3. After a brief respite, Department X's unofficial Christmas Countdown is back up, now coming in at a grand total of 311 days until Christmas. You can imagine my delight.

4. I recently swam with dolphins. They were merry.

5. I still fear Squirrels and wish for their swift demise.

6. In Mexico there are large squirrels called Agoutis. I accidentally saw one give birth. It was horrible. But I could not look away.

7. I have learned how to play Cribbage! A game of strategy and cunning, my love for this little joust with cards is swiftly surpassing my lust for rhinestones; however, the card game requires constant basic addition from its players, thus serving as a constant reminder of my inadequacies in remedial math and basic addition.

Well, that's all for now! I don't want to reveal TOO many of my secrets!

But I promise to blog again soon-thanks for checking back!

Leaving on a jet plane...

I am leaving for a week-long business trip this Saturday, and I won't be back for a whole week.

Not that I am posting all that much these days that you would notice; but, I thought I would let you know anyway, as I am sure a good post will await you upon my return.

In the meantime, let me introduce you to my newest purse obsession.

Super Secret Readers, meet purse. Purse, say hello to my Super Secret Readers....

L.A.M.B. be thy name.

Don't mess with Texas, or Jell-O shots.

This past weekend, your own Little Miss Westchester traveled into the heart of Texas to visit old college friends Spanish Houlihan and her husband Sergeant Houlihan for a long weekend of fun and respectful conversation. Originally, Sergeant and I had intended to SURPRISE Spanish by flying me down in the morning so that I would be in their apartment by the time Spanish got home from work.

Clearly, the element of surprise was key here, so for the entire week leading up to my trip, I spent my days daydreaming about the fun ways I could reveal my presence to Spanish. In one scenario, I would hide in a large box and Sergeant would tell Spanish a package had arrived for her-then when Spanish came close to the box I would pop up with a clown nose on and goggles! In another version, the one I ultimately settled on, I would quietly hide in the back of Spanish's closet; and then, when she went to hang up her cowgirl hat, I would jump out at her with spirit fingers ablaze. In both scenarios Spanish would react first with a scream and then, once she realized it was ME standing there behind the folds of her hangers and clothes, she would dance around the room gleefully-and oh how we would laugh and laugh.

What Sergeant and I did not plan for, and what I could not have foreseen, was that Spanish had somehow known about our plans since the day after I booked my airline ticket. Spanish offered to act surprised if I wanted to hide in her closet, but I declined. Respectfully.

Over the course of the weekend Spanish, Sergeant and I ate burritos, attended Halloween parties, drank the “cerveca,” and then spent large portions of the following day sleeping OFF the effects of the cerveca and some ill-advised Jell-O shots.

I think the trip went really well despite the fact that during the first 24-hours of my trip, my luggage was lost on the flight down, the Houlihan family pet got her paw cut at the vets office requiring a stitch and medication, Sergeant’s car was towed resulting in a $100 ticket, and we were all hung over for the entire Sunday of my visit. Could this be a strange set of unfortunate coincidences, maybe? Or MORE likely, it was fate’s little way of "Trick or Treating" Spanish and I for wearing slutty Halloween costumes.

Many thanks again to Spanish and Sergeant for their warm Texan hospitality.

Bean Town, USA

This weekend the Westchester family loaded into a 747 and journeyed to Boston to visit my brothers: Golden Boy, Johnny Money, and Weezer.

As soon as we arrived in Bean Town, I could feel it in the air that this visit would be one to remember…right down to the discarded condom wrapper and already-been-chewed gum I found under my hotel’s bed. But seriously, our hotel room looked like a crime scene.

On Friday night, my family ate a great dinner at one of the area’s best seafood restaurants and then it was on to a comedy club to catch Craig Ferguson (the current host of “The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson”) who was very funny and earned the approval of my mother despite his frequent use of the “F-bomb” and reference to "sexual intercourse." I give Craig’s comedy routine a rousing thumbs up, and yes, I would make out with him.

Then on Saturday, we met Weezer (now a proud freshman at Boston University) at the college book store, and helped him stock up on BU apparel and Starbucks coffee. I scored a very cozy pair of sweatpants out of the deal and plan to wear them every chance I get. Next it was on to the Cheesecake Factory for lunch, followed by a much-anticipated visit to the Body Worlds Exhibit at the Boston Museum of Science.

If you have not heard of Body World, it is a highly controversial, international exhibit whose purpose is to educate people about human anatomy and maybe give them a better understanding of effects their lifestyle choices have on their bodies. It is controversial, because it features the cadavers of deceased human beings-without their skin. I saw the lungs of a smoker and a coal miner. I saw the body of a woman who had been five months pregnant when she died, and the little baby frozen in her womb. I mean, it is nuts-but the thing is, the bodies have been preserved through this process called “plasticization,” and don’t look completely real. Anyway-if you are at all interested in human anatomy-this is a must see….but I would recommend eating lunch BEFORE you go, rather than after. Just a suggestion.

Next, my brothers and I visited some historical Boston sights (i.e. Paul Revere’s “One if by land, two if by sea” Church), before heading to Golden Boy’s apartment in Boston’s Italian North End. If you ever go to Boston, this area is another must-see. From the authentic Italian Bakeries and Butcher shops, to the little old men in lawn chairs on the corners-it is a true cultural goldmine. From the cobblestone streets to the gelato shops on every block, it was like being back in Italy-and THAT is something I can get behind.

Finally, my family and I ate dinner at this AMAZING Italian restaurant near my brother’s apartment called Bacco. I had the special, which was a dish filled with butternut squash ravioli, yellow raisins, diced mango, salmon, fresh shrimp, and a rich cream sauce. As you might imagine, it was like a party in my mouth-and everyone was invited.

On the plane ride home, I accidentally told my parent’s about my lingering debt from this summer’s Europe trip to which my mother (even the optimist) responded with: “You’re never gonna get out of THAT hole.”

Bless her heart.

Now I am back in the office, and wishing I was back in Boston. Sigh. I love my brothers.

Something wicked this way comes...

As you may recall, I spent this weekend in Chicago with my girlfriends. On Friday, Peppermint Patty treated me to the hit musical Wicked as a belated birthday present. The show was amazing; and as was expected, I cried a few times during the performance. I would highly recommend seeing this musical if you are at all interested in the theatre.

Saturday brought the wonderful, and highly anticipated wedding of college friend Nurse Blondie. The whole gang was there: Fucking Early, Jazzy A, Spanish Houlihan, Peppermint Patty, Foxy Sunshine, and yours truly, Little Miss Westchester. From Blondie’s beautiful gown to the delicious dinner and fun-filled dancing, I think everyone in attendence would agree with me when I say, that I am really good looking.....

But seriously, the wedding went off without a hitch and I just had an amazing time!

Here is a great photo of the girls and me before the reception. Now I can’t put my finger on it, but this picture reminds me of another group of well-accessorized Americans, hell bent on having a good time...but now, who am I thinking of?

Oh yes, now I remember....


Thanks again to all my girls for the amazing weekend, I hope we can all get together again real soon (I call dibs on the electronic repairman)!

The best European slideshow...EVER

Before I set off on my grand European adventure with good friend Peppermint Patty (and later, Patty's Law School buddies Angela and Michelle), I promised you a full recap of all of my adventures as well as some great pictures. Well, as you may have imagined, I lied about that recap.

Now a full two weeks since our return, I have wanted to write about my trip almost as much as I did while I was on the trip (which may explain why my travel journal only chronicles the first 2 out of our 16-day vacation). But far be it from me to withhold the pictures from my adventure; because let’s face it, I am photogenic, and I want the world to know it. So here are some of the pictoral highlights from my vacation-I hope you enjoy them!

Let’s start this slide show off with a great shot of my head….in front of an artistic photo of Sevilla’s famed cathedral, La Giralda. This magnificent "church" sits in the center of the city’s historic Santa Cruz neighborhood, and is a real joy to behold (especially after sunset).

Next we move on to Italy, and of course, the Roman Colosseum. When the guards weren’t looking, I cleverly managed to repel into the pit of the ruins…this proved to be a somewhat foolhardy decision, as there were very few ways out of the pit that didn't require climbing and I have no upper body strength.

This is an entirely unrelated picture of a goon. He wasn't on our trip, but man is he funny to look at!

Below I am reenacting the famed scene from Audrey Hepburn’s popular film Roman Holiday, at “La Boca del Verita.” According to myth, if you stick you hand in the mouth of this statue and tell a lie, your hand will be bitten clean off your arm…. In the future, this will definitely make me think twice before offering false promises of trip recaps.

Soon it was on to Athens, and of course, the Parthenon. Here I am posing dramatically.

Finally, here is a picture of Peppermint Patty, myself, and trip late-comers Angela and Michelle before boarding a ferry boat back to Athens from Crete. You can’t tell from this vantage, but I was having a remarkable hair day!

As you might have guessed from these photos, Patty and I had an unforgettable trip-and created memories to last a lifetime. I am so thankful I had this opportunity to experience some of the world’s greatest cities, and that there was a doctor in Rome who was able to reattach my hand before the shock wore off.

Greece is the word...

Greetings from Greece!

Last night Peppermint Patty, Patty's law school friend Michelle and I arrived in one of the world's oldest cities, Athens. There we met up with Patty's law school friends Angela and Jimmy who were thrilled to host us in their family's "home land."

After a quick shower, we hopped on the metro and rode to this amazing restaurant "Kalokairomos" where we enjoyed delicious Greek cuisine like Octopus, rich Feta cheese, dolmades stuffed with ground beef and rice, moussaka (layers of beef and eggplant), lamb kabob and several bottles of wine. And as a special treat, there was a stage at the front of the restaurant where performers sang traditional Greek songs and danced traditional Greek dances from all of the islands while wearing the traditional garb. It was awesome-and somehow, your very own Little Miss Westchester ended up on stage trying my best to keep up with the professionals and shuffel along with the music.

Next we walked around the town, stopping in several cool bars and marveling at the souvenier shops. One thing I noticed, which I did not know about Greece, is how many stray dogs and cats rome free in Greece. Ranging from small kittens to old pups, these friendly animals follow tourists around (hoping to get some TLC and snacks) and sniff around the restaurants for scraps. One dog, who we cleverly deemed "Jimmy 2" followed us around all night long. He smelled pretty bad-but we were glad to have him along for the walk.

At around 6 AM we made it home where Patty, Jimmy and Angela slept on the open air roof, while Michelle and I preferred to sleep in the bed. At six AM, there are no stars left to sleep under-so sheets and pillows just seem a hell of a lot more appealing.

Today we plan to visit the Parthenon and the Acropolis before hitting the town again. Tomorrow we will catch an early ferry to Santorini and then it will be on to Crete!

I am having a truly amazing time, and I can't wait to blog all about it when I get back.

European Update!

Hello from Florence, Italy.

Ok, I will admit....maaaaaybe promising one update a country was a little beyond the scope of my traveling capabilities; however, rather that crying over spilled milk, let's get right to the update, because it's £5 an hour and I only have 30 minutes left. BOO. ( Not to worry, I promise a much, MUCH better update when I get back!)

So far, Peppermint Patty and I have traveled to Barcelona and Sevilla, Spain. And man was that amazing. Although I must admit, knowing any Spanish at all is a huge blessing as many people we encountered in these cities had a very "loose" grasp of English. And when I say, "loose," of course what I really mean, is no grasp at all. Luckily, I am a stellar Spanish wiz...and despite having a VERY shallow grasp on vocabulary, verb tenses and general phrasing...I was able to get us through.

Today, after a lengthy flight from Sevilla to Milan (a hefty £100 fine for Patty's overweight luggage) and a 2 hour train ride through the Italian countryside, we are now in Florence. So far, we have only had time for one VERY delicious meal and to gaze longingly into the windows of shops long since closed for the day. But tomorrow we will start strong with a visit to the Accademia Museum and a viewing of Michelangelo's David.

Overall, it has been the most amazing trip of my life and it is not even half over. After Florence it is on to Rome, then Athens, Santorini, and Crete.

Thanks for checking in, and hopefully I will have something more for you very soon!