This post is like my dead fish Elvis-filled with regrets of what could have been.
If you are like me, you try to incorporate elaborate analogies into everyday conversations...and you have a love/hate relationship with cheese.
That's why I was THRILLED when good friend Spanish Houlihan sent me THIS- a list of the top 56 "worst" student analogies compliled by area teachers, and printed by the Washington Post.
Here are some of the highlights:
- He was as tall as a 6′3″ tree.
- From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
- John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
- He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
- She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
- The lamp just sat there, like an inanimate object.
- Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
- The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
- It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
- Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like “Second Tall Man.”