Summer Rental

In less than 60 days, I will be escaping my daily chains of employment and joining the entire Westchester Family in a cross country journey to Cape Cod, Massachusetts.

Believe it or not, a 24 hour drive to the East Coast in a conversion van is FAR less glamorous than one might think. Especially when more than half of the people in the car are boys.

Smelly boys.

Smelly boys that have nothing to lose, and are far from trying to impress any of the other inhabitants of the van.

For 24, long hours.

Good God.

In Westchester Family tradition, our little band of beach enthusiasts (plus one dog) will crowd into the family van at around 4 in the morning in a strategic bid to beat the Chicago traffic. For the next 6 hours, my dad will single-handedly pilot the van towards the sunrise-refusing to stop for any reason until Indiana. Knowing glances from toll booth operators serve as his only company, as the rest of the Westchester brood is dead to the world in the back seats-legs jutting at every which angle in a failing bid for comfort.

My strategy has always been to try and sleep for as long as humanly possible, because as you might imagine, absolutely nothing good can come from waking up. Either I am quickly reintroduced to the harsh realities of the McDonald's breakfast menu, or I get forced into taking a turn behind the wheel. Luckily, the van comes fully-equipped with a small TV and VCR; and something tells me this car trip will serve as the perfect opportunity to expose my family to the horrors and mass genocides of Uganda-via The Last King of Scotland….perhaps I will wait to pop that bad boy in until just before it is my turn to drive.

On the plus side, once my family reaches our coveted vacation destination, all is right with the world, and you better believe the most work I will be doing for the next two weeks will involve walking to and from the beach, and MAYBE shucking some farm fresh summer corn for dinner. Other than that, I am as close to “good for nothing” as a person can get.

Thank God for vacation!


(The Last King of Scotland's James McAvoy/#5 on my top ten list of celebrity crushes)