Coffee with an attitude.

Just when I think I can't possibly get ANY klutzier, I go ahead and do something like this.

Every morning when I travel from the parking lot into the office I am always struggling to balance my load of large and awkward items. From my snackified lunch box to a sometimes umbrella, huge Nalgene bottle filled with water, a purse and a freshly poured cup of steaming coffee, my arms are full, but I somehow manage not to drop anything.

Today though, something was different.

As I was hurrying from my car towards the building, I was shocked and dismayed when (for no particular reason) some of the coffee jumped through the small sip hole on the lid of the Styrofoam cup, traveled two feet through the air and landed, miraculously, right into my work-appropriate cleavage. Not my chest of course, but right into my cleavage so that it had a cleared path down through the base of my bra and then onto my stomach...burning the entire way down. (See cartoon below for pictorial reenactment.)

Apparently, I am going to need to start wearing a protective helmet and flame retardant body suit to protect myself from, well, me.

Reenactment: