Moon over Milwaukee.

This Friday I will make my big cube move from one end of the room to the other. On one hand I will no longer be subjected to “Coworker E’s” rantings about the fat content in cheese cake. On the other hand, I will be right next to me supervisor. On the third hand, I will be a little closer to this group of semi-cute guys working in one of the company’s marketing departments. But on the fourth hand (this is getting out of hand), those guys are obnoxious…..so I really hope they don’t come near me.

So there you have it.

Speaking of the weekend, on Friday night after wasting a few hours watching “Must Love Dogs” with my mother, I got a call from my pal Lance Friendly asking if I wanted to meet him at the Harp. So I gave Hope Valentine a call, and after taking a few tequila shots we started walking towards Water St. Usually, I would move the story along to later in the evening; however, this walk was to be unlike any I have ever taken before.

You see, as we walked along the road chatting and giggling like school girls, we could not know that there was a shocking and unforgettable surprise awaiting us by the Astor Hotel. No sooner had we crossed in front of the hotel’s front door that I noticed a strange-looking gentleman clad in black basketball shorts, a grey hooded sweatshirt and huge black sunglasses smiling at me from across the street. I tried to look away, but my eyes lingered just long enough to see him turn around, pull down his shorts, and starts bellowing, “Yoo hoo” towards us in some kind of a sick sing song voice.

Rather than scream (therein giving this perv his jollies), I quickly hissed to Hope “Whatever you do, don’t look over there, there is a weird guy mooning us and you don’t want to encourage him.” Being the reasonable lady she is, Hope complied and the strange marauder soon disappeared back into the shadows from whence he came.

This leads me to my next point. Why is it that its always the weirdos and circus freaks mooning me! Couldn’t it be a hot guy, just once! Needless to say, I spent the rest of the walk lamenting about how it all would have happened differently had I been carrying a b.b. gun. If nothing else, I could have scared the shit out of him, although….he did after all have his pants down, so it was probably better to leave well-enough alone.

Soon we arrived at Water Street where we met up with Lance and a bunch of his friends. From the Harp we went to the Terrace Bar….which sucks-and at that point the bars closed anyway so we went to an after party at one of Lance’s friend’s condos. After we arrived, the other girls and I launched in to an extensive conversation about skin care-which then turned into a Q&A session with the dermatologist who happened to be at the party. Good times.

Saturday came and went, as did Sunday, and now I am at work and wishing for a raise.



Mooning Reenactment:

Note: No pumpkins were harmed during the creation of this picture.